Thoughts on TTD? (trashing the dress)

Our local paper did a story on this not too long ago. It was a good story, but the repsonses irked me. I just don't understand the controversy.

http://www.kansas.com/living/fashion/story/149290.html

I'll copy the resonses:

Trashing tradition

Comments
i think its great! I love the pictures!
Posted by: parisha

8/16/2007 7:48 AM
Nothing like recycling a story idea from the KC Star.
Posted by:

8/16/2007 8:12 AM
She got the idea from me. I invited her to one of our sessions. Also offered her some of our pics. We do great work!
Posted by: Delano Color Imaging

8/16/2007 8:53 AM
Denise... what's up today's Wichitalk cover photo? Could the Eagle not find a model to fill out the bust of that wedding gown? Geez... find that girl a gown that fits properly!
Posted by: cee

8/16/2007 10:20 AM
ABSOLUTELY, INCREDIBLY INCONSIDERATE!!!My wife spent months planning and weeks making just the right dress that our daughter wanted.Just another modern day, self indulgent, "it's all about me, and I don't care what the cost" attitude. Especially if someone else pays the price, financially and emotionally.Not even remotely respectful or respectable!
Posted by: Dad

8/16/2007 10:53 AM
What a great idea!!! and what awesome pictures. Resale on a wedding dress is next to nothing and like the article said who is going to wear this 30 years down the road, especially if you have only boys.......unless one of your boys becomes a drag queen then it might work....lol
Posted by:

8/16/2007 1:13 PM
These are some she turned downwww.delanocolor.com/TTD-at-CH
Posted by: Delano Color Imaging

8/16/2007 5:41 PM
Check out this website http://trashthedress.wordpress.com/; the pictures are awesome!!!
Posted by:

8/16/2007 6:06 PM
i like totally agree dad she should've saved that dress for her 2nd or 3rd wedding.
people are so wasteful.
Posted by: it's terrible people actually think for themselves

8/16/2007 7:45 PM
Every generation finds some way to embarrass its traditions. It just gets worse and time goes on. A few may regret the memories brought about by saving the dress for daughters and grand daughters, but fewer and fewer seem to care.
Posted by: Sadbuttrue


What great photos. Trashing your dress isn't for everyone, but most brides today pay for their own dress so let them do what they want. For goodness sake it's a dress their trashing not the marriage!
Posted by: KS mom of 4

8/18/2007 9:17 AM
can't people find better things to do these days? give me a break................
Posted by: plenty of things to do

It just amazes me that so many people feel they can tell others how to live their lives...........
The one about the dad paying for the dress........Umm.....ok, so you want to spend money on something that will sit in a damn box forever, as opposed to something that can get some really great shots for some really great memories?
So glad that we paid for everything ourselves. I would hate for our family to try to dictate how we do our wedding. Of course, our families wouldn't do that anyway, but still.

Labeling........and what I blog about.

Today I went through and labeled most of my posts. I realized I have talked about my kids once, my dogs never, and my wedding has monopolized my blog.
Well, we will get some more wedding posts, as our reception isn't until the 8th..........but I promise to introduce y'all to more aspects of my life.
It's amazing how a wedding can completely consume a persons' life.

Trash the Dress story

Ok, so last Monday we had a blast with this photo shoot. I spent the morning running all over town getting ready. My dress was where it was supposed to be, so that started the morning off right.

We met Jeff and Tyfanny (the photogs) and Barry and Steph (the video crew) at 3 pm in Old Town.
DH and I were pretty nervous.....we've never done anything like this and aren't used to being in the spotlight. I was totally excited, I've wanted to do this since the first time I found out about it! When I first started wedding planning there were similar shoots, called "the day after". Typically done by destination wedding brides in an exotic location, ie....the beach.

The Day After shoots are typically done the day after the wedding. It's a way to capture just the two of you in a more relaxed way. Most brides do some 'sexy' shots. Since my beginning days of photog blog stalking, I've seen these day after shoots gradually evolve into something else. The brides became more daring, wondering into the cities with their trains dragging behind......going under the water......etc....
Eventually this became known as "Trash the Dress". A controversial name, but I love it! Most brides don't really "trash" it, as the dresses usually clean up quite nicely.

Around this same time, TJ Studios and Fat Cat Productions, right here in Kansas, were coming up with the same concept. A unique way to capture some awesome shots, the Extreme Session.
There is now a website devoted to this concept. http://trashthedress.wordpress.com/
As I was stalking this blog one day, I noticed a list of photographers off to the side. OMG! There was actually a listing for Kansas! I immediately ran to check these people out. Well, not really physically running, just running online. What I found amazed me! I could not believe we had such talent right here where I lived!

Yes, I stereo-typed my area as not being creative. I didn't even try to find a local photog for my wedding, thinking they were all boring and did nothing but posed people shots.
You see, in my photog blog stalking, I really came to appreciate the un-posed and material shots. Once I realized we had local talent, I was really ashamed of myself.
I had already booked a photog in Mexico, so it was too late.

BUT! I could use them after the wedding, to trash my dress. We didn't do the day after shoot in Mexico. Instead we enjoyed our honeymoon and when we returned, I contacted these amazing people for a TTD session.
It took some convincing for DH. Apparently after one night of beer tasting, I showed him all these websites and informed him that we HAD to do this. I had already been e-mailing Tyff and knew the cost, so DH had no way to argue. I was very persuasive and would not let him go to bed, just showed him more and more TTD shots.....until he finally wore down.

Ok, back to last Monday. Here we are in a park in Old Town. Me in my dress, DH in a tux. He was NOT happy with me. You see, I would not let him wear his silk suit he bought for our wedding. I made him wear a tux. So, he was VERY hot. Oh well, life goes on......

Tyff, Jeff, Barry, and Steph are wonderful to work with. They put us in poses that didn't look like poses.....it took awhile for us to relax, but we finally did. Oh, and the ladies thought my shoes rocked! Which of course, they do, but we got a lot of shots of them! Which of course, I loved. And Steph wouldn't stop gushing over my veil! Well, that is until we actually trashed it......But hey, it's not like I was going to wear it again! (story later)

We started in the park, then wondered behind on old unoccupied building by the train tracks. Got some great shots there. Climbed up a fire escape ladder, laid down on the concrete, etc... A few trains went by, and one even waved to us. Probably wondering what these crazy people were doing. Then we went under the train bridge. It was crazy, cars driving by, peoples heads whipping around, horns honking.......

We found some more cool buildings, then found a shopping cart in a parking lot. Yes, they put me in the shopping cart. We had fun, until I felt my veil pulling. Yep, it got caught in the wheel. Everyone (except me) was so upset about this, that we didn't get any pictures........kinda ironic, we actually 'trash' something but don't have the shots. I seriously didn't care. I had no plans of ever using it, and only bought it because it was 1/2 off and I wanted some cool pictures of it blowing in the wind. I didn't get those shots on my wedding day (no wind) but we did get some that day. So, I was happy, the veil had served its purpose.

Next we went to eat at Old Chicago. This shooting thing is hard work! Then we headed to a lake for some sunset shots. This was another thing I didn't get at my wedding (no sun that night). Unfortunately, it was clouding over and the sun was gone for this shoot also. Oh well, we still got some amazing shots at the lake.

First off, they put us in this air thing. They didn't want us wet, yet. We started to drift away from the beach area, into the tree area. No worries! Steph and Barry hopped in the paddle boat to come rescue us. Except the paddle boat wouldn't steer right. They just went around in circles! All 4 of us ended up stuck by all the trees. Jeff and Tyff were back at shore, clicking away. We ended up having to walk through the brush, then in the water to get back to the beach area. I hope we have some cool shots of that!
Then it was time to get wet! The pictures will tell that story. When we left the lake, the owners came out to say good-bye. They had been watching, thinking it was all cool, until I ran INTO the water. They couldn't believe it! Too funny! We'll have to be sure they see these pictures......

Next we went back to Old Town. We ran through and danced in the fountains. Alot of people were around, probably thinking I was crazy. I heard one guy ask them if we were professional models! How crazy is that? I didn't hear our photogs response, but I wanted to yell, "No, we're just crazy in love!"

Then we heard a band playing outside at our favorite wine bar. So, we headed over for a dance. Got lots of clapping for that one!
Then back to Old Chicago (did I mention we had our first date there?) for some shots under a street light. We ended the night on their patio with a beer.

Here are the pictures:
http://www.tjstudios.com/blog/
and the slide show:
http://www.tjstudios.com/blog/debut/scott/
and the video blog (no video yet, it hasn't even been a week!)
http://fatcatrocks.blogspot.com/2007/08/extreme-session-kick-off.html

I'm amazed I'm able to show these off so quickly! These guys are truly amazing!

I trashed my wedding dress!!

Not going into the story right now, because I'm exhausted and need some sleep. But, here is the link to my photogs blog.......just click on view in our blog entry.

http://www.tjstudios.com/blog/

Enjoy! I know we did! Couldn't have turned out any better.

Never tell a bride this!!

We don't have/can't get your dress.

I had this happen to me twice.

The first time was when I ordered my dress. I came home one day to a message on my answering machine. It said "We tried to order your dress but the manufacturer said it won't be here in time". That was it. WTH???
Then the next message "Since the one you tried on is your size, we will hold it for you, but need you to call to confirm this"
So, I call and they say it is all worked out. I have a new one being made and shipped to me.

The second time I heard this was today.
I'm trashing my dress on Monday. So, I took it to the cleaners last week. They said it would be ready on Friday, and I said I would get it on Saturday. Well, I sent DH today to get it. He calls and says they don't have it. WTH?!?!?!? I don't know how long I waited for him to call me back, seemed like an eternity. But he finally did. They found it. Had sent it to their main shop. Isn't that what computers are for, to keep track of that stuff??

Wedding day!

I'm really not sure why I've been procrastinating this post for so long. I guess because of all the stories to tell??

Ok, so we wake up in the morning. Yes, we saw each other the day of. Maybe that's why so many things went wrong? Advice to soon-to-be brides: "Don't see your FI on the wedding day!"

I started getting things packed up to take on the ferry. We stayed in Playa del Carmen, but the wedding was on the beautiful island of Cozumel.
Anyways, I picked up the bottles for our sand ceremony and dropped one. It was in bubble wrap, so I thought it would be okay. Even though I heard the glass breaking. Sure enough, it was in too many pieces to count.
At this point I decided I had enough stress about this wedding and I delegated it to FI. After all, I still had to get a mani/pedicure, hair done, dressed and all that.

My daughter, MOH (maid of honor) and I went to get our nails done. Then we grabbed my son and headed for the ferry with my mom.
We got a taxi, got to the ferry and I realized I did not tell FI to grab the travelers checks to pay our photographer with. Since cell phones were not working, our only option was for my mom to go back to the resort and try to find him before he headed for the ferry.

So, my kids, MOH and I all arrive in Cozumel. We were lost. Quite the culture shock. A cruise ship was docked to the ferry/cruise area was packed with people. We stand on the side of the street trying to get a taxi and they just keep driving by us. WTH? I think this went on for about 5-10 minutes before we asked someone WTH? We were on the wrong side of the stop. Ok, so we finally make it to Mr. Sancho's.

I tell my WC how we're doing the music. She has a sound system set up for our Ipod. Except we don't have an Ipod, we have my FI's blackberry. WC's DH says that some phones have a different sized jack and it may not work with their sound system. OMG!! Then they say that they have a ton of music on their Ipod and can just create our playlist for us. Well, I don't have our playlist, it's on the blackberry with FI. I again say I can't deal with this. FI will have to figure it out with our WC when he arrives.

When he does arrive FBIL (his brother) comes to tell me that they found a bottle to use for our sand ceremony. It's a tequila bottle with a wine cork in it. Genius! I should have had put FI in charge of more things!
And his blackberry connects with the sound system. Whew!

As we're getting ready, our photographer starts to get worried about the light and rushes us. It was cloudy, so no sunset pictures that I dreamed about! I don't have them yet, so I can't comment.

As I'm walking to the ceremony location, I have to walk down a little hill where the grass meets the sand. Everyone can see me at this point. All eyes on the bride. Well, I almost fell. Tripped on my dress.
Good thing I can laugh at myself. But then, I was so scared that I would fall for good, I rushed down the walkway. There was no: one step, stop, one step, stop: walking for me. When I reached my isle runner, I couldn't bring myself to walk on the monogrammed part! I stepped around it!

The ceremony was beautiful. We had those closest to us read 8 blessings.
First Blessing:
May you be blessed with love. May understanding
bring a deep and abiding peace into your lives,
fostering a love that is not only passionate but
serene. May this love between you be strong
and enduring.

Second Blessing:
May you be blessed with wisdom. May you
continually learn from one another and from
the world. Together, may you grow, deepening
your knowledge and understanding of each other
and of your journey through life.

Third Blessing:
May you be blessed with community. May you
always be blessed with the awareness that you
are an essential part of a circle of family and
friends. May there always be within this group
a sense of mutual love, trust, support, and respect.

Fourth Blessing:
May you be blessed with art and beauty. May your
creative aspirations and experiences find expression
and bring you joy and fulfillment. May your sense
of humor and playful spirit continue to enliven your
relationship.

Fifth Blessing:
May you be blessed with health. May life bestow
upon you wholeness of mind, body and spirit. May
you live long that you may share many happy years
together.

Sixth Blessing:
May you be blessed with the experience of nature.
May nature in her magnificence continue to inspire
you and bring you a sense of transcendence. May
the elements of earth, air, fire and water sustain
you and heal you.

Seventh Blessing:
May you be best friends, better together than either
of you are apart. May you work together to build a
relationship of substance and quality. May you respect
each other’s individual personality and philosophy and
give each other room to grow and fulfill each other’s
dreams.

Eighth Blessing:
Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.
Where you go, I will go, and where you stay, I will stay.
Your people will be my people and your God, my God.

We did the sand ceremony and oh, it was beautiful! I will post pictures after I get them. We had FFIL officiate our wedding. Which made it even more personal and special.

We also did the hand ceremony. Camerons mother read it.

When we sat down to eat, DH (yes, not it's dear husband!!) got heat exhaustion. He eventually cooled off and started to sweat, but we were worried for awhile. The food was good, although I didn't get to eat much.

We we were leaving (had to be sure to catch the last ferry back to Playa) we tried to pay everyone. We were paying Mr. Sancho's with credit card, but it wasn't working. We had been using it with no problems, but it just wasn't working. We called the number on the back of the card and they said they didn't even see any transactions trying to go through. So, we messed with that FOREVER and finally got it. I was really hoping we wouldn't miss the ferry.

When we got to the ferry, I told FIL that I needed to get my tickets out of the suitcase (he had it for some reason). But, my MOH said she already had them. Whew.......until we got to the ticket taker. They weren't tickets, they were the stubs from the ride over!!! Shit! Did I mention we were last in line? For the last ferry of the night??? FIL was on another one with my tickets! I start freaking out. I tell the guys that my tickets are on another ferry in a suitcase. Bless their hearts, they go looking for the suitcase. And they find it, but it's so late. I was so scared they would leave us!
Of course the things in the suitcase weren't tickets, they were vouchers for tickets!! So, we had to run back to the beginning and get them changed. Then run to get on a ferry. The only place to sit was in the front, facing everyone else. I saw several camera phones snapping pictures.......

When we got back to Playa, we stopped at Senor Frogs. What a blast! They made us recreate our first dance on stage. Then take a shot of Tequila. We had so much fun! I only had one Margarita there, but I passed out when we got back to our room.

I'm a horrible blogger and stalker

I'm behind. I promise I'll catch up!! I'm off to read everyone's right now, then I'm posting about my wedding day. Promise.

Sunday, water park

So, today was supposed to be our 'relax on the beach' day. But, since our plans got all messed up, we are going to the water park. We forgot to take our camera, so no pictures. Sorry!!

Another early morning day. FI, me, my mom and the kids head off to Xel-Ha. Not too bad. We loved the swimming with the dolphins! But the rest was just okay. Looking back, we should have gone somewhere else, did the dolphin thing for a couple hours and be done.
The place was crowded and we spent more time walking around than anything else.
But, the kids had fun. I guess that makes it worth it, right??

When we got back to the resort, I attempted to go out with everyone. But, it's been such a long week, I basically fell asleep at the table. Oops....

Day 2, Saturday, tour day

Ok, so today we wake up bright and early. This seems to be habit forming, yuck! It's the day to take the tour to the Mayan ruins, in Tulum. Who is going? Well, FI and I, the kids, my mom, his mom and step-dad and his dad and step-mom. Quite the crew, heh? We are the only ones going on this tour, no other touristy people. I have to start this off by saying this tour was great! http://www.playa.info/ If you go to Mexico, do something with these people!

Our guide and tour pick us all up, and I get in the back. Big mistake. I sometimes forget I get car sick. We're driving for what seems like forever. And just when I'm about to tell them to pull over, they stop. Whew........just in time. I get out and walk around in the shade. FI's mom gives me something and I'm feeling better in about 30 minutes. Wish I could remember what that stuff was called............

The first thing we do is see the ruins in Tulum.


Absolutely gorgeous! When we were done we went to the gift shop, but I was so hot that I didn't buy anything except a picture frame. I wish I would have got a book to read more about the Mayans. Very interesting stuff.

Up next we drive to a cenote. This is my first snorkeling experience. The old foggies don't get in, but FI, me and the kids do. It was absolutely stunning to look in the water like that, but the whole snorkel and goggles didn't bode well with me. The goggles kept fogging up so I couldn't see, and I was having issues breathing threw my mouth and having that tube in my mouth. The kids loved it!! I think my son should be a marine biologist as much as he loves water.

Next we went to a private Tulum beach area. Our guide made us lunch and I wish I would have got a picture of it. It was great. We relaxed on the beach and tried to do some body surfing on the waves! This was the best part of the weekend. I can't even begin to describe how great the Tulum beaches are. You'll have to go for yourself.

After the beach, it was off to another cenote. It was pretty crowded and we were all pretty tired, so we didn't stay long. We all wish we would have stayed at the beach longer. Which is one of the great things about this tour company, they do things at your pace. No set in stone schedule. There's Ken almost falling in.

Alex decided she wanted to jump off the cliff. We really didn't think she would, but she did!! Then it was back to the resort.

Our first day in Mexico

We wake up fairly early today. It is Friday. I originally planned on going to the water park with the kids today, before our other guests arrived. But, we had to do everything that was planned for yesterday and put the water park off until Sunday. (which was supposed to be our relax on the beach day)

So today we checked our email, made several phone calls regarding our lost luggage, contacted our wedding coordinator and photographer to let them know we arrived, went shopping for clothes and greeted guests as they arrived. We also filled our out-of-town guest bags for everyone.

I found these cute little bags and put stuff like Mayan playing cards, tissue, book marks, sunscreen, aloe vera gel, wet wipes and cards in them.

We made a card that said something to the effect of "if you're taking digital photos, please share them on our website...." So we have a ton of non-pro pictures of the weekend. So nice.

We handed the bags out that night at our welcome dinner. Everyone had arrived on time except FI's Dad and step-mom. They arrived shortly after our dinner ended.

Day one of our wedding trip

This would be Thursday. We drove up last night to Kansas City and stayed at the Holiday Inn by the airport. This morning we got up at 3 am. It was actually easier than I anticipated. Everyone was excited about the day and quietly got dressed and ate. We were at the airport by 3:45 am. BIG mistake! They didn't even start checking in until 4:30 am. Our international flight was set for 6:00 am. So, we started the line and waited around for the 45 minutes. We check in our 8 suitcases, and carry on many more.........There's 5 of us traveling, so this is easy to do.

This was a horrible day. My FI has (crap, I can't remember what it's called) but he stops breathing in his sleep and requires a breathing machine. The breathing machine requires distilled water. According to FSA regulations, only 3 oz. of liquids are allowed on carry-ons, unless it is a medical reason. He's flown several times with his bottle of distilled water with no problems. Well, the lady in KC decides he's not allowed to have it (even with the medical note from our Dr.) and throws it away. We almost missed our flight arguing with her about it.

We rush to the plane and all is good (except the lack of medical water).
Then we sit on the runway for an hour. Apparently Chicago had some storms and we had to wait. So, when we finally get to Chicago we have about 10 minutes to make it to our next flight. Surprisingly enough, there were about 20 people on that KC flight that were going to Cancun, through Chicago.
We all take off running.........I may be on UTube! Here I am, carrying my huge-ass wedding dress, yelling "excuse me", jumping over obstacles and just hoping we make the flight. I did see some people taking pictures with their cell phones. We get to the gate with 5 minutes to go. Except the plane there was going somewhere else. Our Cancun plane already left. You would think that walking dogs everyday that I would be in better shape. I can't even curse at anyone because I can't breathe!!!
Now you see 20 people, heads hanging, SLOWLY looking for customer service. We get in line and I call our travel agent. While we're waiting in the horribly LONG line, she is trying to find a new flight for us.

I guess I should say this was United Airlines. I'm pretty sure we will never fly with them again!!! When we get to a person and explain we missed our flight, she tells us the next flight is the 21st, mind you this is the 19th. Umm..........excuse me! I'm getting married! I will be in Mexico TODAY!! We start telling her about flights that FI was able to see on his blackberry and our travel agent calls and tells us of some flights. The customer service lady was obviously pissed that we found flights through other companies. She wanted us to arrive 2 days late because she wanted us to stay with United. F You!
Then we realize that this is probably happening to the other 20 some people who missed that flight. I go down the line and pass the flight info. on to them. Those ladies behind the counter were glaring at me and some were even crossing their arms, not wanting to listen.
Again, we will never fly with them again.

This new flight does not take us directly to Cancun. We have to go to Atlanta. Fine, whatever, I'm getting to Mexico today.

When we arrive in Atlanta, we have to get our tickets for our flight to Cancun. No problem, we have like 2 hours there.
I was so proud of my kids. They did SO well with all the running and waiting. Oh, and lack of sleep.
I'm sitting in Atlanta trying not to look at my watch. We were supposed to be in Mexico at 12:30 that day. I had pretty much every hour of our trip planned out and we were loosing hours.

When we finally got on the plane in Atlanta. I watched as my luggage drove off without getting on the plane. I posted on all that drama below........

We finally got to our resort at 10 pm. 10 hours worth of stuff that didn't get done. And life goes on.........